Couple Vision Board Night

Vision Boards have become a great new way in recent years of creating the perfect outline for the upcoming year. Whether that’s to travel more, purchase a new home, or even set relationship goals this is a way to begin to organize your yearly vision! Typically vision boards are done among friends. Everyone comes over, pop that bottle of Stella Rose, throw on some Ari Lennox and begin a night of girl or man bonding, and good memories. However I felt That I wanted to do something a little different this year. My husband and I have had a fairly decent 2019, we’ve had bumps as does any other married couple however this was our chance for quality time, and share what we both want to see come to fruition in 2020. Starting the year off with my husband was ideal not only because it’s optimal time to relax and and get our creative juices flowing, but it was our start to laying the foundation for 2020. Though I won’t spill all the beans on what the many images on our boards symbolize I will say that we shared similarities in what we wanted, and most were really self explanatory. Despite who or where you choose to conduct your own vision board night make it fun, meaningful, and don’t be afraid to be as creative as you want. The Object of it all is to plan your course of action towards a very successful New Year! 

Welcome December

Hello December

We’re now closing one decade in preparation to enter the next! May you maintain momentum towards fulfilling your goals. Create that business plan that you’ve continued to delay due to the fear of failure. Stop making excuses as to why you haven’t created that brand or product that could bring in residual income. Let’s not allow the temptation of procrastination keep you from taking care of business, creating that blog, write that book, or express yourself in other art forms. Let’s go into this new decade with the idea of changing the world, making a difference in the lives of those in need! And most importantly minding the business that pays us! So here’s to the month of December, we welcome you and look forward to year 2020!!!!

A Letter to my supporters……

Affirming notions almost serves as a form of a diary for me. It’s a way that I’m able to express my feelings, my thoughts, and give my personal testimony on the many things that I have endured in my own personal situations. I’m working in efforts to give other women like me the comfort in knowing that though many women are afraid to say it, we all had our tough times in our careers, finances, and even intimate lives. No one is perfect and it takes years of trial and error to truly find yourself, learn what you will and wont tolerate in your life, and build the women that you are destined to become in life. Those tough situation provide you the tough skin to deal with the world, it builds character, and it is a vital piece in defining who you are. So don’t allow society to ridicule you for not making choices in regards to your life to fit their ideal image of what they believe are suppose to take place in life. Your truth is the foundation of you, it instills your good and bad qualities yet in still they are the foundations that define who you are.

That career you’re struggling in is only a stepping stone to better opportunities.

That failed marriage or relationship is making way for that man or woman of your absolute dreams

Those bouts of financial insufficiency is making way for your break through in financial freedom.

And that business that doesn’t seem to be getting off to a great start is only trial and error, eventually you will create that formula that will give you that anticipated breakthrough.

I absolutely hate the fact that social media and personal opinions are tearing women down, it’s discouraging them, and creating negative vibes all around them. We have to learn to step back, review all those things that are going wrong in our lives, and use it to our absolute advantage.

You’re beautiful

You’re strong

You’re more than enough

You’re smart

You’re optimistic

And you are a women of so many qualities that none of the above can prevent you for obtaining the goals and aspirations you have set in life……….

With immense Love

Tarisha…….

What’s on your bucket list

VACATION!!! I most definitely need one of those right now, however when you’re a working parent of 3 taking those as often as you’d like seems impossible. Despite what your situation is as to why you may not be able to take that well needed Vacay right away we all have dream bucket list of places we’d love to visit one day. I can say one destination on my bucket list is currently in the works for 2020. But that’s a later blog post so stay tuned. Any who the point of today’s topic is to list my top 5 bucket list destinations that hopefully I’ll soon be able to travel to in the near future.

Cartagena is filled with vibrant colors, crystal clear waters, Colombian dishes, and a mix of Caribbean and Spanish heritage. This destination is located on Colombia’s Caribbean coast, and is home to people of both Spanish and Afro-Columbian decent. While visiting Columbia be sure to visit some of these top tourist attractions.

1. Volcan de lodo El Totumo: This volcanic mud pit is rich in minerals such as sulfur, Magnesium, and Zinc. The exfoliating properties help to remove dead skin and impurities. So if your down for a natural way to cleanse your skin be sure to pay this spot a visit.

2. Castillo de San Felipe de Barajas: a magnificent fortress located in the city of Cartagena. Built in 1536 this landmark served as a military installation and ultimately became a very popular area for travelers photo ops.

Although west and South Africa are on my bucket list, you can’t visit the motherland and not be sure to pay Egypt and the city of Alexandria a visit. Known as one of the 7 wonders of the world here you will get the chance to walk in the footsteps of Egyptian royalty, as well as visit some amazing museums such as the Egyptian Museum in Cairo.

The secluded islands known as the Maldives are extremely breath taking. Highly recommended destination for any romantic getaway. Here you are sure to get some quality alone time with your significant other as well as a great deal of pure relaxation. This vacation spot is also known for their luxurious villas perched above clear blue water. So if you’re planning a romantic retreat for you and ya boo thang this is most definitely the go to.

Carnival, Beaches, Nightlife Rio De Janeiro is a necessary stop for any bucket list. Visit the Tijuca Rainforest which is home to wonderful waterfalls, mountain peaks and a wide variety of animals. Brazil’s natural qualities will leave you breathless.

Last but not least Rome Italy home to fashion, the Catholic Church, Italian dishes, and famous works of art. The cities variety of breathtaking Romanesque, and gothic style buildings are appealing to the eyes and make for great backdrops for those insta travel photos.

These are only a few places from my list, and I can’t wait to share the destination I will be visiting next year. So while we’re on the topic “What’s on your bucket list?”

This Blog Life

Starting a blog in the beginning seems easy! You think hey I can do that, I can stay just as consistent as the most well known bloggers. However if you want to take your brand to new heights running your blog is just like having a second job! In this post I will explain my many barriers i faced when starting my blog, and the key things I have recently implemented in order to remain consistency in “This Blog Life”.

1. STOP!!!! relying on your friends and family to be your only source of exposure for your content. In the beginning I assumed that I would receive a great deal of support from my inner circle however most of my supporters are those who I have no connection to. Not only does having support from people outside your circle of communication a great way to get more exposure but it makes you feel as if you’re finally seeing the hard work you’ve put in for months.

2. Consistency is key In my early stages of blogging I went into it believing I would be able to post weekly, however that became extremely difficult when it was time to juggle homework during my undergrad on top of being a 24/7 mom and wife. Now I have vowed to myself to atleast post bi weekly and if I have time I’ll squeeze in and extra post just to say I doubled my content for the week. So always think realistically when scheduling your post.

3. Challenge yourself…I’ve gotten into the habit of joining 30 day blogging challenges. I start off by jotting down a blog topic each day for a month and I be sure to post them daily for that timeframe. This really helps with consistency as well as keeping content fresh. Speaking of challenges did you know November is National Blog Posting Month??? No! Well now you know so be sure to hop on this challange.

4. Join a blogging support group… I’ve been an active member of a Facebook Blogging Group “Black Women who Blog” that I’ve found very useful with networking with other bloggers, but also a great way to share tips and ideas that could potentially help with growth and development of your own personal blog.

5. Believe in he content you have….the most important part of being a content creator is believing in what you have to offer. As Muhammad Ali once said “To be a great champion you must believe you are the best. If you’re not, pretend you are.” So trust in what you have to present to the world and believe you’re journey as a blogger will is well worth it.

Dynamics Of Submission

I must say what I have today for you all is something the good Lord is teaching me to do!!! SUBMISSION……No I’m not talking about that move wrestlers do, I’m talking about the ability to submit to your significant other. I myself can be extremely outspoken, and demanding. I hate being told what to do, and I’m more so the one to give the orders rather than take them. So basically it takes a real man to deal with what comes in this small package. However from time to time I can say that I love when my husband speaks up and puts his foot down. Relationships including a strong marriage require both individuals to submit to one another or it simply wont work. There’s more to this topic such as the spiritual aspect but I myself don’t consider myself very spiritual though I’m a work in progress. However I’ve taken the time out to look at submission from a lower level. Often times we get caught in wanting to be the HNIC and forget that a relationship is a partnership, and requires both to receive equal amounts of respect and gratitude.There was a quote I heard recently in regards to submission it said “without the neck the head wont move”. This quote simply means it requires both the head and neck to operate to its full potential, and in order for a relationship/marriage to run it takes both the man and woman to work as one. When women hear “submission” the first thing we say is “oh hell no not I, nobody is telling me what to do, I’m my own woman” but in reality submission doesn’t mean dictatorship. It means men are to simply serve their roles as man of the house, however as women we’re to be sure the man has the substantial support he needs to successfully run it. This also means in the event something is to happen to that man, that he is also prepping that women to be able to survive on her own, keep things afloat, and run that same household as he would in his absence. Now I’m definitely pro woman however I know first hand of what its like to carry the load on your only simply because I thought I could get things done better than my husband could, but in reality allowing him to be the man and taking some of the load is how I can clear my own plate. If your like me submission doesn’t seem ideal but this is what comes with sustaining a successful relationship, or marriage. Though society has its own views on how submission should be conducted in a relationship its ultimately up to the two involved to discuss the matter and create their own terms. My husband and I have recently had this conversation and it is and will continue to be a learning process for us both. So do what is necessary for you, and no matter what continue to give one another the upmost respect.

In closing I would like for you all to also listen to a video created by Fantasia and her husband In regards to what it means to submit to one another. They definitely dropped some gems.

Dealing With Anxiety

“Anxiety-A nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks.”

Most people deal with this on a day to day bases and aren’t even aware. I myself have dealt with this significantly over the past few months. This year has been extremely hectic, from starting a new career to graduation, and now beginning my master program. It seems to be a never ending ordeal. But let me fill you in on a little back story of when it all hit the roof for me. In marchI began a new job working for the Family Dollar Corporate Office. In the beginning the job seemed like a piece of cake until I truly learned what it all consisted of. The desk that i currently manage is ALWAYS extremely heavy, there isn’t really much down time, and simply learning the job was a headache in itself. Most days it felt if the light bulb came on during training, and other days all i could think was “WTF WAS I THINKING FOR TAKING THIS POSITION”. When the time came for me to fully take full control of the desk things got worse. I no longer had a trainer, and due to the company consolidation my entire team was brand new. I was the only Seasonal McLane Allocation Analyst for the entire country for Family Dollar and the thought of that sparked my anxiety. There were days i would go home after work to a glass of wine and even worst shots of Crown Apple just to calm my nerves. I continuously checked work emails on my phone to be sure I didn’t forget to take care of something the day before, or if my buyers had issues with things being shipped on time. I even began taking work home on weekends just to catch up. I was drained and EXTREMELY tired, overwhelmed, and even slightly depressed. Being a mother, wife, and student is a job in itself, and now I was adding burdens of my job to my plate. I suffered from severed migraines, exhaustion, moodiness, and it felt as if I was beginning to fail at everything I was attempting to do. There was a dark cloud hovering over me until one day I had enough, and began to step away from the many things contributing to my Anxiety, as well as implementing things to help me cope when dealing with my episodes.

1. Schedule one day out of the week for yourself to decompress from the week. I have given myself Saturdays of doing whatever I want to do. Most times I spend it with my mom shopping, or going out to eat. Whatever day you choose be sure its a day strictly for you to enjoy.

2. LEAVE WORK AT WORK, if you are dealing with job related things like I do simply leave it where it is, trust me that job will be there, and if you are stricken with illness due to your lack of sustaining your mental health your job wont be there to get you through that ordeal.

3. Indulge in therapeutic activities. I myself find crafting, listening to podcast, and music over a cup of herbal tea to be the most therapeutic for me.

4. Jot it down! Writing down how you’re feeling and elaborating on how these things are affecting you allows you to strategize on ways to overcome your anxiety. Sometimes putting your thoughts down on paper is a way of venting.

5. BREATH!!!…..Stress is a silent killer, your health means so much more than those things you are consistently worried about. So breath! Trust me things will all work out for the best.

You aren’t alone there are many who deal with anxiety, some can manage and others require other alternatives to cope with it. However its better to be aware of it, than to ignore it and make matter worst for both your physical and mental health. It’s ok to step back when necessary, It’s ok to need a break from your children, or spouse, its ok to require a day to yourself. You aren’t Wonder Woman, your human, and maintaining your mental is extremely important to be the best you can be in whatever you do.